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A musical list of the names of defunct magazines.
(To the tune of I Am a Very Model of A Modern Major General by Gilbert & Sullivan)
By Bill Dyszel
The many paper publications writers once were writing for
Have mostly disappeared and left a handful all are fighting for
They went by names like Mirabella, Cosmo Girl, and Living Well
Amazing Stories, Omni, and Organic Style and Mademoiselle
And Spirit of Aloha, which you may perchance have read in flight
And also Windows Sources, HomePC, Musician, Cue and Byte
And 7 Days and Audio, and Quick and Simple and Cachet
And, PC Magazine, but no understood that anyway.
When Budget Living says they’re broke, you know conditions aren’t so nice.
And don’t forget Success, whose claim to fame is that they failed twice.
McCalls, Industry Standard, House & Garden all have gone away
And Rosie sank as fast and deep as Underwater USA.
When Country Journal, Harper’s, Jewish Woman, Coronet and Mode
Have followed New Age Journal as they all were flushed down some commode
When Blueprints future plans have all been relegated to the past
And National Lampoon will surely not be who is laughing last.
When Women’s Sports and Fitness, Golf for Women, Gusto, Sync and Spy
Are only sold along with Lifetime at that newsstand in the sky
All writers start to fear that their careers are headed for the drain
A lot like Talk and Child and Life and Look and Lear’s and George and Jane.
The experts all are telling us that in our brave new century
There’ll be new opportunities exciting and adventur-y
But to a freelance writer none of this may seem too funny,
Cause you know the next to go will close up shop and owe you money.
(Created for the 60 Anniversary of the American Society of Journalists and Authors)
Duration : 0:2:34
[youtube EjlvYOmXLc8]
better to laugh …
better to laugh than cry… says one Photoshopped out of existence. brilliant.
so, we’re supposed to take the laptop into the lavatory, now?
Thanks for …
Thanks for commenting. You’re right – it’s sad, especially for all the people who worked at those magazines. It’s a really tough haul for them.
As a fellow …
As a fellow freelance writer, I found this entertaining… but with a sad truth behind it all.
Thanks, it’s …
Thanks, it’s definitely gallows humor. I wish another kind were available. -bd
Ain’t no ‘splainin’ …
Ain’t no ‘splainin’ this stuff! Thanks for watching! -bd
Me too! Hang in …
Me too! Hang in there! -bd
Why bother? They’re …
Why bother? They’re exterminating themselves.
YES! magazines need …
YES! magazines need to be exterminated
So sad. I hope ours …
So sad. I hope ours is never added to the list.
Yeah, I too noticed …
Yeah, I too noticed the mistaken inclusion of Harper’s. Funnily enough, it’s the one title I wish WOULD go out business, but it’s supported by lefty foundation money. That’s one way magazines may cling to life.
As a writer, I find …
As a writer, I find this both very funny and very painful, which I’m sure was the intent. Great, great song and video. ..bruce..
Good catch – I …
Good catch – I should have said “Harper’s Weekly,” a different publication which has come and gone from time to time since the 19th century, but is currently gone. I put up the wrong cover. I’ll fix that in the director’s cut.
Harper’s didn’t go …
Harper’s didn’t go out of business.